Me, of Little Faith

(pic from this site)

Me, Of Little Faith

(Lessons in Humility, Patience and Trust)

Lying in my bed for the past two hours with no sign of sleep only made me more antsy, frustrated and hungry. Debating whether to maintain the rest mode or feed my grumbling stomach- it wasn't long before I gave in to my flesh.

It is easier to appease a growling tummy than to pacify an anxious heart. I lazily got up, cooked instant noodles and sliced a piece of egg pie.

The worry rat that I am have been on the edge for days. My source of restlessness- our visa application, rather the long, hard wait for the K1 a.k.a US Fiancee visa.

What if our packet got lost? What if John forgot to include a document? What if we made a mistake? What if it takes years before they finally approve our application? There goes my what if tirade again...

It’s been more than two weeks since my fiancé sent our pack I-129F, the first step to the fiancee visa application and we have yet to receive any response or information from the United States Citizenship and Immigration Services (USCIS). From what I’ve heard from other applicants I’ve met on-line, it typically takes a few days to two weeks the most to get an approval or worse, the dreaded Request for Further Evidence (RFE). We haven’t gotten either of the two and two weeks have already passed.

I couldn’t silence the what-if voices inside my head anymore. I finally instructed John to give USCIS a call which I would later regret. The USCIS staff informed him it might still take a month before we’ll get a response from them.

What?!!

That just sent me to panic mode. The phone call only made me feel worse.

That's such a long time! What about our wedding date? Our invitation? How come? Why?

Thank God, He gave me such a patient, understanding and prayerful future husband. John tried everything he could to console me and keep me optimistic. The night after the call- between chewing my midnight snacks and trying to make sense of the turn of events, my wandering eyes caught a familiar sight: my maroon passport peeping through my plastic envelope where I keep my K1 documents.

The Lord, in a still, small voice gently rebuked me.

"Lj, my child when will you ever learn to fully trust me? Have I not shown you enough? Have I not proven what I can do? Have I ever failed you?"

I felt so ashamed I almost choked on my noodles. I answered NO to the last three questions. Then, He lovingly reminded this forgetful, faithless, frail soul…

"When you applied for a tourist visa, you didn’t have the money and everyone was telling you, you wouldn’t get it. But I proved them wrong! You didn’t just get a 10-year multiple entry US visa, it all happened at a record-breaking period of one month including your renewal of passport!

How many times have you been to the US since you got your visa? Twice! And without spending much.

You are the only member in your extended family to ever step foot on US soil. Not even your very hard-working, late grandmother made it out of the Philippines.

Some of your cousins have settled down and have beautiful kids, but you are the only one in your family who has the privilege to plan and prepare for a wedding. And to actually have one in the US!

You envy people who have lots of money? Guess what? They've worked longer than you and harder than you, but were they able to enjoy the wealth they've amassed? Most important of all, have they invested in what really matters?

To top it all- have I not blessed you with a great guy and an amazing family-in-law to-be?

Patience, my dear. Worrying will not get you anything or anywhere. Have you forgotten your favorite verse?

I, not you will make all things beautiful in MY time, not yours. (Ecc. 3:11a) Trust me."

Though embarrassed, I slept humbled that night.

A few days later my fiance posted this message on my FB wall…

John Schroeder LJ good news it (NOA1) came today finally in the mail Yayyy!

HELP!!!

Help me help these youth finish high school.



The school year is almost over. Although this is a time for celebration for most students and parents, there are those who are filled with uncertainty if they'll be back the next school year due to poverty. Such is the case of these youths. Most of them out-of-school for a year and some longer.

As a sign of gratitude to the good Lord and in honor of the people He used to help me with my own education, I committed a huge portion of the sales of Eating With One Chopstick limited, hardbound edition to Bring Them Back to School Project. I vowed to help 10 young people in Bicol finish high school by providing for their basic expenses such as tuition fees, baon, school supplies, books etc.

Whenever you buy a copy of the hardbound issue of Eating With One Chopstick (P500) part of the sales will go to their high school education.

Whenever you tell your friends about EWOC, you bless not only these kids but family members living in solo-parent homes as well.

Whenever you promote EWOC, you also support local publishers and local authors like me!

If you're interested to buy in bulk or even just a piece or if you want me to talk to your church or organization about Bring Them Back to School Project or sign some books, just let me know by e-mailing me at ljsalceda@yahoo.com.

Many thanks and Dios Mabalos!

What a year!

Has it really been three months since my last entry? Geee, where have I been? :)

Let me do some retracing… After the launch of my first book Eating With One Chopstick last September, the DZAS team went to a retreat and planning last October, by November until late December I was occupied with hosting duties, then came the Christmas festivities. Before the year ended I went back to the US for the second time and now my hands are full again with fiancee visa application and wedding preparations. Whew!

Don't get me wrong though, I'm grateful for work and I feel doubly blessed that I'm doing what I love. And I am in no way complaining for what has transpired the past few months. I am very PLEASED to announce that I'm getting MARRIED and I will soon be with the man I love. But I will save that for another post. ♥

So for now, here’s a number of pics as proof (more like excuses for not posting) of what the last quarter of 2010 has been like to me. Have fun!


Hosting Kumustahan sa Karuhatan with Ptr. Jay Banzuelo


Pagsamba't Papuri launch and concert at CCF


Hardin ng Panalangin booklaunch (Ptr. Joey signing books)


Hosting CLC Malolos opening (with CLC staff)


Christmas party with cancer patients in Pampanga


Recording the DZAS Christmas jingle


Green Team visiting our partners and listeners (FEBC Karoling)


DZAS dinner (c/o Ptr. Eric Maliwat)


Hosting Kuya Melvin and Ate Lorna's renewal of vows


DZAS exchange gift (a.k.a. Shembot party!)

Batanes, Here I Come!

Picture from Wikipedia

Batanes, here I come!!!
Lj T. Salceda

I can not specifically recall the time my traveler’s feet have been awakened. Perhaps it was when I started participating at Girl Scout camps in grade school. Probably whenever I watch adventure films or browse through travel magazines in the library. Maybe when my family transferred to three different houses and I moved to three different schools in one year. My memory fails me in many occasions, however I do remember my passion for travel and adventure started at a very young age.

What they say is true, “If there’s a will, there’s a way or ways.” Being born in a solo-parent household in the province with limited resources trained me to exercise my feet and my faith. I was able to attend numerous religious, summer and girl scouts' camps all over Luzon and Visayas with the help of family, friends and even strangers. During my high school and college days, I baby sat after classes and during weekends, knocked on politicians and businessmen’s offices to solicit and worked as a service crew to earn money for my education and for extra-curricular activities like camps and seminars. I even borrowed bags, sweaters and shoes because my family couldn’t afford any unnecessary expenditures.

Now that I’m working, I scour airlines for budget-friendly fares, work on holidays for extra cash and join contests like this one to travel for free or at a minimal cost. I have been to some of my dream destinations both here and abroad such as Palawan, Boracay, Bohol and recently the USA in spite of my meager income.

There are times when I wish I could just travel to have a good time, to relax and to forget about work, stress and problems- but I can’t. No matter how much I try, I simply can’t.

I always bring work, family and friends with me. Not literally though, more like figuratively speaking. When I go to a new place I always have this “what can I share to our listeners and how could I incorporate this experience on my radio show?” mentality. My mind automatically shifts to research, program or writing ideas and mental notes. Except for pasalubongs, I always ask what is something good and positive or beautiful in my trip or destination that I can bring back to my people or my work?

My itinerary always includes a lot of picture-taking (earning me the title of a photoholic c/o of my boyfriend), bonding with the locals, trying delicacies, immersing in their culture and swapping stories about my place or my life. I even record interviews or conversations with their consent for future use or as references on my show and my blog.

Traveling is both a gift and privilege I believe. God used and continue to use different people and organizations so I could do what I want and reach my dreams. I vowed to thank God and honor these people for their sacrifices and help by being a responsible traveler and by sharing my experiences. This is one of the reasons why I often write about my journeys on-line and my personal journal.

Traveling has always been an integral part of my life. It excites me. It inspires me. It enlightens me. And it has enriched my life beyond measure. Now that I only have a few months left in the Philippines before I join my future husband and start our own family overseas, I want to grab every opportunity to explore and be awed by my beloved LuzViMinda and its Creator.

If I will be given a chance to go to Batanes, I will consider it an answered prayer, a present to be treasured and a dream come true.


This is an entry for SeaAir's Batanes Winter Bloggers Tour. To vote for this entry, like the link on SeaAir's FB page. Thank you very much and Dios Mabalos!

Picture Perfect Bohol (Part 2)

PICTURE PERFECT BOHOL (Part 2)
Lj Salceda
Read Part 1 here.


TOURS / ITINERARY

Day 1
After the church service in the morning bags in tow, we rushed to the airport, grabbed our super expensive lunch at the terminal (we should have eaten elsewhere, but we didn’t want to be stuck in traffic and check-in late) and waited for our flight. We arrived in Tagbilaran on a Sunday afternoon and the sun was almost gone. Since it is Sept, sunset is typically early in Bohol. We only had a short time left for a little picture-taking, checking the beach, dinner at the nearby grilling station where they have the most delicious fruit shake I’ve ever tasted, before trying Dumaluan's pool and hitting the sack for the day.



Day 2
We woke up at 8am, ate our breakfast (not much to choose from, but it was all you can eat) and prepared for our country side tour scheduled at 9am.



Our itinerary included the Blood Compact Site, Baclayon Church, Tarsiers, Man-made Forest, Loboc River Cruise, Chocolate Hills, Butterfly Farm (don't forget to try their unique ice candies made from carrots/durian/kiwi etc) and Hanging Bridge. After the tour, we decided to drop by at a nearby mall to buy some supplies- bottled water and snacks because they are expensive at the resort.

The nice thing about getting a package is you need not worry and arrange for the tour or look for a vehicle/driver for transpo (public transpo is rare in Bohol), entrance fees and even our lunch for the Loboc River Cruise because these were all taken cared by the resort. Sometimes, our driver also acted as our tour guide and photographer. Don’t forget to give him tip (P100) after his full day service especially if he has been nice and helpful to you.







For dinner on our second night, we tried the nearby Bohol Beach Club's menu and their swimming pool. We were too excited to taste their food since the first night we passed by the place they had a buffet at the shore and a great number of Koreans were lined up. So we settled for their group meal made up of sinigang, grilled seafood and meat, mixed veggies and rice. Disappointingly it wasn’t worth our money. Don’t eat there! The meat was hard (makunat), the seafood was stale, the broccoli was yellowish and the soup wasn’t hot when it was served to us.



Probably the reason why they had very poor lighting (candlelit lang) at the resto area- so we won’t see much of what we’re eating. We had a few miscommunications with our waiter who wasn't well-verse in Tagalog. They do have an appealing resort and a better shore, but the food is not worth it. We (non-BBC guests) were required to pay P300/person as entrance fee which is consumable and non-refundable- P200 goes to the food and P100 for the use of pool. After dinner, we went back to the grilling station beside BBC to have another round of fruit shake, before going back to BBC’s pool (included in our entrance fee.)




Day 3
Our third day consisted of Dolphin Watching, Island Hopping and Snorkeling- but we decided to forego the latter in order to try the zipline and cable car at a nearby site.






Smaller islands in Bohol are quite distant from each other, it would take between 40 mins to an hour to get from point A to B. We were bored in between; all we can do was to take pictures since conversation was not possible because of the loud motor of the boat. Instead of spending longer time at the Balicasag island, where snorkeling and lunch are offered, (Btw, another tip I got from bloggers don’t eat on this island unless you have baon or packed lunch. Price here is outrageous! P350/kl of any seafood or meat, plus P250 cooking charge. Not practical.) Although, I later found out from another blogger that there is a nice diving resort situated here. We decided to cut our stay here short and head to The Virgin Island. Now this one, you shouldn’t miss! There’s a sand bar where you can walk, swim, take pictures, eat fresh sea urchins, drink refreshments and buy souvenirs from Manong who owns a small mobile store here.





After a lengthy boat ride, we went back to Dumaluan for lunch and inquired from the reception area about a nearby place that one our driver's told us that has a zipline and cable car (this is different from the one in Danao.) The resort staff said, we might want to avail of their Panglao tour instead of just renting a vehicle which we readily took. In lieu of the usual itinerary, we suggested to our driver to scrap the church-visits and Hinagdanan Cave and go to the Ostrich farm, Adventure Park and Bohol Bee Farm. Tip: Talk to your driver and make your own tour/schedule.





The Ostrich farm is a small backyard with caged animals like albino python, turtles, fish, birds and other reptiles. You need to pay P20/person as entrance fee. Here you can also take pictures alongside life-size images of Dora the Explorer, a gigantic tarsier and the ostrich.

Afterward, we went to a very new adventure site (some areas are still under construction but it is already operating) near the Loboc River. They offer zipline, cable car and horse-rides. It costs P350/person for the zipline and P250/person for the cable car. However if you avail of both rides, you will only pay P500/person. It was one of the highlights or our Bohol trip, so give it a try it if you’re not afraid of heights.





After an exhilarating ride, our last stop was the Bohol Bee Farm. I wished we had more time at BBF which is also a resort cum restaurant and souvenir shop. There are so many things to do and buy there! You can pay a minimal entrance fee for a farm tour. You can see the bee house where their honey is produced, you can watch them make ice cream at their factory, visit their green house where most of the veggies and food are grown and even make your own bag or keychain at their souvenir house/livelihood center.

I was considering housing us at the BBF, but I read that they didn’t have a shore only a viewing deck, a good number of mosquitoes and ants reside in the place and the road to and fro BBF is still rough. They are also situated above a cliff, so they are a little farther away from the airport and other tourist spots. We only had time for a little picture-taking and food-sampling at BBF. Dinner consisted of a vegan pizza and a meat pizza, halo-halo topped with malunggay, ginger, mango, buko and chocolate ice creams, muffins and their famous flower salad.

Btw, we paid an additional P2500 for the van/driver for our Panglao tour because it wasn’t originally included in our package.

Day 4
On our 4th and last day, our short time was spent packing, settling our bills, taking a few more pictures and eating breakfast before checking-out and driving to the Tagbilaran airport for our 10am flight.

All in all, our trip was a memorable and fun time for me/us. It wasn’t without slip-ups, but you can choose to see the good/positive side in every situation.





MORE TIPS:

1. Don’t buy souvenir items at the souvenir shops inside or near the resorts. They cost 2 to 4 times more than the ones available outside the resort. Buy from the stores near Blood Compact Site and the stores near the Hanging Bridge. Bohol shirts cost from P300-400 at the resort, the same shirt will only cost P100-150 elsewhere.
2. If you have the time and space in your luggage buy/bring bottled water, food and other necessities at the mall. A small water bottle costs P30 at the resort, when you could only get them for P10-15 at the mall.
3. Bring cash or prepare your credit card. There are no nearby ATMachines in Panglao area.
4. Bring more than one pair of bathing suit. Most resorts don’t allow people to use their pools without wearing proper swimming attire. If you plan to do a lot of swimming and picture-taking and don’t want to use a dripping/wet suit bring as many swim suits as you can.
5. Don’t forget to bring your sunblock, cap/hat, pamaypay and insect repellant. Mosquitoes and other insects abound in Bohol. Although, I haven't heard of anyone getting dengue there.
6. If you want to try jet ski, banana boat and other water sports, you will have to pay a considerable amount. 15 minutes of jet ski costs around P1500 (1-2 persons), while 30 mins of banana-boating costs P2500 (group).
7. And don’t forget to store extra battery or your camera/video charger.





CONCLUSION:

Bohol is a picture perfect and postcard destination. But Tagbilaran airport still needs improvement, there are cunning drivers/businessmen and the way to the resorts are the typical provincial scene- lush trees/plants/narrow roads/cows grazing in the yard etc. Don’t expect perfection, we live in a fallen world after all.

If you see trash, pick them up and throw them in garbage bins. Be considerate to the next traveler/tourist. Arrive on time. Keep an open mind. Don just have a good time, make lasting memories. The Philippines is such a blessed country, enjoy it while we can with the people you love!

(More pictures on my facebook account.)

Picture Perfect Bohol (Part 1)

Picture Perfect Bohol (Part 1)
Lj T. Salceda

The Philippines is such a blessed country. This I realize every time I travel. We have beauty, treasures and endless potential from Luzon to Visayas and Mindanao. I've witnessed and marveled how God has been SO generous to us Filipinos and even foreigners who come and enjoy our 7,107 islands, our people and our culture.

While I was preparing for the book fair and the book launch, I knew I will need a vacation after a such a stressful and hectic schedule. So an out-of-town trip is a must! My boyfriend was also coming to support my book- another reason to go on a trip/vacay.

I was torn between – Davao or Bohol. Both are in my list of “places-to-visit,” unfortunately I can only go to one place since I have a limited budget and time. I excitedly started doing research for my next trip. In any vacay or travel, planning is an integral part. Personally, I don't mind doing the leg work because I both love traveling and planning. I asked friends, read reviews and contacted resorts. After a few weeks of taking down notes and consultation (there were 5 of us in the trip, 2 of them have been to Davao before), we unanimously decided- it's time for a Bohol Adventure!



AIRFARE / FLIGHTS

Since I am a PAL Mabuhay miles member, boarding a different airline company was not an option for me. I used my accumulated miles and only paid P900 for a round trip ticket. But I had to pay P3,000+/person (round trip) for the rest of my companions. All in all, our airfare totaled P14,000 (5 persons). For your travels, remember to set aside a budget for cabs to and fro the airport (if you don't have a car/someone to drive you off), airport fee of P200/person and other possible expenses like food or drinks. Avoid eating at the airport if you're on a tight budget. The food there is pricey and it’s not worth your hard-earned money. Just to give you an idea, a regular rice meal with adobo as viand plus soda costs a minimum of P250/order. You could grab something to eat at a nearby fast food chain before checking-in.

Three weeks before our target date, I went to the PAL Office in Cubao to purchase our tickets. I later found out that if you use credit card and book online, you’ll save more moolah. That’s a difference of almost P500/ticket. Problem, is I don’t have a credit card, so I pay everything in cash.

Btw, from years of personal traveling experience one of the best times to go on a vacation or tour (domestic) in the Philippines is during the month of September. Although this time of the year is still considered rainy season, most islands in the Visayas or Mindanao areas don’t get rains/typhoons during in September. It’s not a peak season either as classes are still on-going and resorts usually offer Rainy Day packages. Some things to consider when you’re looking for flights: the weather, travel (peak) seasons, budget and even your airline’s arrival/departure time.



BUDGET and ACCOMMODATION

After securing our flight, we needed a place to stay. One of the good things about Bohol is there’s no shortage of accommodation. You can choose from the pricey, 5-star hotels or resorts to the affordable, basic yet still comfortable bed and breakfast inns. Majority of your budget will also go to accommodation especially if it's a package you want to get.

I asked friends and turned to travel blogs on-line for ideas. I narrowed my list to three possible “temporary homes” while in Bohol: Dumaluan Resort (as suggested by Ate Haydee, Ptr. Jay and FB Friends); Panglao Island Nature Resort and Spa (as suggested by Ate Maloi) and Bohol Bee Farm (from the reviews I’ve read on-line).



Things to remember when choosing for a place to stay:

1. FACILITIES - What are you looking for in a resort/hotel? Do you want it to have spacious rooms, a big pool, a stone-throw away from the beach, wi-fi accessibility, souvenir shops etc?
2. PRICE RANGE – Is it under your budget? Do they have packages/promos?
3. FOOD and DRINKS – Most resorts have canteens and restaurants, some even have bars, but not all of them have good food. If they don’t have satisfying or affordable food, can you get it somewhere near? Can you cook in your room? Is the resort located near a store/grocery/market?
4. SERVICE – Are the staff accommodating, friendly, helpful, respectful etc.? Can they offer alternatives or ideas regarding tours or transpo or other things you need?
5. ACCESSIBILITY – Is it near the airport or the beach or other tourist destinations? Do they offer transport service (airport/seaport pick-up)? If not, are they near public transpo/terminals/rentals? Is the road safe and comfortable for travelers?
6. OTHER OFFERS – Do you want to have a massage? Jet-ski? Banana boat rides? Snorkeling gear?

After weighing in all the options, I decided to avail of Dumaluan Resort’s Rainy day package which covers rooms, use of facilities including the pool, airport transpo, tours and daily breakfast. I deposited half of the total amount of our package to their bank account 2 weeks before our arrival.

Since we wanted to try everything that Bohol has to offer, we decided to add another day to our package. We paid a total of P30,000 for 3n/4d, 2 rooms, 3 tours for 5 people for our stay in Bohol. Lunch and dinner excluded, except for lunch at the Loboc River Cruise (part of the package).



Part 2: Itinerary and more tips from our Bohol trip.

31

(pic from this site)

31
Lj T. Salceda

“I’m getting old,” I complained to my guy. “Who isn’t?” he jokingly answered. Oo nga naman! May tama s’ya dun!

Age is an accumulation of days/time. That's why we have sayings like, "age is just a number." Sabi naman ng iba na ayaw magpabuko ng edad, "Kalabaw lang ang tumatanda." (According to some who don't want to reveal their age, "only carabaos/water buffalos grow old.")For some, age or life is a collection of experiences or lessons or accomplishments or victories. Unfortunately for some, they do not only make a career out of being miserable but worst, they also devote their lifetime to failures, defeats, problems and what-if’s. I’d rather not. I choose to see the glass half-full. Life is too beautiful and too short to be missed out.

In a few days I’ll be celebrating another 365 days that have passed (will pass). Before I reached my 30’s, I listed 30 of the things that I wanted to do/accomplish before I officially turn 30. A milestone for me, since I’ve always thought I will die young because I’ve been sickly as a child/teenager.

As I went through the list one more time, I was overwhelmed by emotions- happiness, gratefulness, fulfillment, hope and excitement. There’s also a tinge of sadness and a bit of disappointment in some areas, but the positive feelings certainly outweigh the negative ones.

Almost half of what I listed had come to pass (YAY!), though there are still plenty that I have yet to fulfill. Two weeks from now, I’m glad that another item on my list will become a reality. It maybe a year delayed, but everything happens for a reason I believe.

After years of writing and with Church Strengthening Ministry’s help, I will be launching my first book: EATING WITH ONE CHOPSTICK: Growing-Up in a Single Parent Home.

So if you or someone you know is a:

1. SINGLE-PARENT (including separated/divorced/annulled individuals; teenage-mother/father; a mother that bore a child out of wedlock; spouse of a prisoner/OFW; a guardian of grandkids or nephews/nieces; a widow/er; victims of abuse/rape that resulted to pregnancy)
2. SON or DAUGHTER of a single-parent
3. PASTOR or LEADER of a solo-parent ministry or organizations
4. PERSON involved in a BIGAMOUS or POLYGAMOUS relationship (a mistress/other woman/man)
5. An ABSENTEE father/mother (including emotionally absent parents, alcoholic, womanizer, abusive parents)

Also, if you (or someone you know) is going through…
- break-up or relationship problems
- gender / weight / self-image issues
- depression / suicidal tendencies
- health concerns
- poverty
- bullying
- vices

Even if you are blessed with a complete, loving family please spread the word about...

EATING WITH ONE CHOPSTICK: Growing-Up in a Single Parent Home
Book launch and Autograph Signing
(With the rest of CSM’s local authors)
Sept 17, 2010 at 6pm
SMX, Mall of Asia
Everyone is invited!!!

Books will be available at a discounted rate exclusively at the Manila International Bookfair (Sept. 15-19). But will be out in local, Christian and leading bookstores very soon.



(my 1st birthday with Pa blowing my candle)

A Mistress and Proud of It

pic c/o of this site

A MISTRESS and PROUD OF IT
Lj T. Salceda

One night while I was surfing through the local channels I caught part of Bubble Gang’s (gag show on GMA 7) episode wherein one of the hosts said, “Bakit kaya ang mga babae ayaw na nambabae ang mga lalaki, pero pumapatol naman sa mga babaero?” (Why do women dislike womanizers, but still choose to be with a womanizer/cheater?)

A few months ago in an episode of the Tyra Banks show, Tyra featured women who deliberately look for and prefer married guys because according to one of the guests, “They (married men) are not scared of commitment unlike single guys.” To which Tyra replied, “What?!! Isn’t that an irony? They are married but they sleep with you or have affairs with other girls? It doesn’t say commitment to me.” Those are not her exact words, but that was the essence of her statement.

Today I read an article about Alicia Keys and Fantasia Barrino’s affair with married men. How each woman was being treated differently especially by the media because of their race, looks and background when they’ve both committed the same “crime”. I won’t focus on the media’s scrutiny/treatment to both artists, I would rather talk about the M-word. Mistress. The other woman. The third party. Women purposely and openly getting involved with married men even though they are aware that these men are TAKEN.

I don’t have to name names, but we don’t have to look farther. Has any of our local celebrities been charged or sued or convicted of adultery, concubinage or bigamy? I haven’t heard of any.

It’s not new and it doesn’t happen in Hollywood or among celebrities alone. It’s very real and it is prevalent (I doubt if anyone will admit esp in a conservative country like the Philippines) to women regardless of age, race, economic status or religion.

I’ve been fatherless most of my life, so forgive me if I will hold my Pa's "other women" responsible why we grew-up in a solo-parent home. After all it does take two to tango. I know some men can hide to some extent their marital status, but it really breaks my heart and bothers me when women intentionally choose/sleep with/have affairs with married men.

However, I am aware that some women are also victims of abusive, manipulative and selfish men. They’ve been in the relationship even before they knew of their husband's or partner’s marital status or past. I also understand how difficult it is to be entangled in an unhealthy relationship, how even more challenging it is to get out and start all over again. So I am not here to pass judgment. I am not here to play the blame game or project a “holier-than-thou” attitude. I am not here to make matters more complicated. I am simply making an observation and a plea- for us to guard ourselves and save our families.

Our perception and tolerance have changed when it comes to sin, lifestyle and our morals. Now, being a mistress is no longer a taboo or even a sin or a crime. It’s no longer just a story in a best-selling novel or the theme of a controversial movie. It is now a badge. A status symbol. A cool thing to do/have. Sins are not dealt with anymore. Crimes are not punished. We've let things be the way it is now.

Whatever happened to the sanctity of marriage? Whatever happened to good values and right conduct? Whatever happened to women being the (one and only) beloved wife? Whatever happened to fathers being role models to their kids? Whatever happened to us? Respect, honesty, faithfulness and loyalty where are they now?

The line that separated good from bad; right and wrong; legal to illegal is too blurry for some people to even notice nowadays. Sad part is, it will still get worse.

"But a man (woman) who commits adultery lacks judgment; whoever does so destroys himself.”
- Proverbs 6:32 New International Version

Never Take Love for Granted
15-16 Do you know the saying, "Drink from your own rain barrel,
draw water from your own spring-fed well"?
It's true. Otherwise, you may one day come home
and find your barrel empty and your well polluted.

17-20 Your spring water is for you and you only,
not to be passed around among strangers.
Bless your fresh-flowing fountain!
Enjoy the wife you married as a young man!
Lovely as an angel, beautiful as a rose—
don't ever quit taking delight in her body.
Never take her love for granted!
Why would you trade enduring intimacies for cheap thrills with a whore?
for dalliance with a promiscuous stranger?

21-23 Mark well that GOD doesn't miss a move you make;
he's aware of every step you take.
The shadow of your sin will overtake you;
you'll find yourself stumbling all over yourself in the dark.
Death is the reward of an undisciplined life;
your foolish decisions trap you in a dead end."

Proverbs 5:15-23 (The Message)

Jeje + Mon = EVIL?

Jeje + Mon = Evil?
Lj Salceda



Kung may FB account o cellphone ka, malamang nakatanggap ka na ng ganitong babala:
based on research: word jejemon came from 2 Greek words....JEJERIUS-means follower, the doer of the command of someone by writing and MONNIUS- means the believers of Satan who have the capability to empower the mind of people..so JEJEMON means follower of Satan who empower the mind of the people by writing.. spread the news…

Mga kapatid, hinay-hinay lang sa pagba-brand at panghuhusga sa mga tao at bagay.

Hindi dahil ‘di mo maintindihan ay sa dyablo na.
Hindi dahil ‘di mo alam ang pinanggalingan ay sa demonyo na.
Hindi dahil ‘di ka maka-relate ay masama na.
Higit sa lahat hindi dahil sinabi ng iba na kay Satanas ay sa kanya na nga ito.

Totoo may mga bagay na ginagamit ng dyablo, pero ang SALITA- kakayahang magsalita, makabuo, gumamit at mag-interpret nito ay galing sa Diyos. Dahil S'ya ang may lalang sa atin.

Ayaw ko rin sa jejemon, pero I don’t believe that they are of or from the devil. Iisa-isahin ko ang rason bakit ayaw ko sa jejemon:

Una, ni hindi nga natin ma-perfect o ma-improve ang ating gamit sa English o Filipino language, nag-aambisyon pa tayong haluan ito ng ibang salita? Kamusta naman yun?

Pangalawa, kung ano ang madalas mong i-practice, yung ang magiging habit and eventually lifestyle mo na. Paano ka magsusulat ng matino sa klase, sa opisina, sa church kung jejenese ang gamit mo?

Pangatlo, isang salita o lenggwahe na nga lang ang gamit natin pero di pa tayo nagkaka-intindihan at nagbabangayan pa dahil sa misunderstanding o miscommunication o misinterpretation, dadagdagan mo pa?

At panghuli, tumatanda na talaga ako kaya plain and simple wala ng “attraction” sa akin ang ibang lingo. :)

Sa kabila ng mga rason na binigay ko, ni MINSAN di ko sinabing sa DYABLO ang JEJEMON. Bakit? Una, buhay at makapangyarihan ang mga salita. Pwedeng jejemon ang uso ngayon, bukas makalawa iba naman ang pangalan nito. Pangalawa, dahil 'di ko pa napag-aaralan at wala akong basehan para gumawa ng konklusyon. At higit sa lahat ayaw kung manghusga dahil hindi yan ang role ko sa mundong ibabaw.

Kung nakinig ka sa interview namin kay Komisyoner Carmelita Abdurahman ng Komisyon ng Wikang Filipino, ginawa n’yang halimbawa ang salitang “lagay”. Sa salitang Waray ito raw ay genitals ng lalaki. Samantalang sa mga Tagalog, ito ay tumutukoy sa kondisyon o suhol (negatibong gamit o kahulugan). Kaya kung gagamitin mo ito sa isang tao o lugar na Waray ang salita siyempre iba ang intindi nila rito.

Sa pagkaka-alam ko hindi GREEK ang pinanggalingan ng JEJEMON at hindi rin naman mga GRIYEGO ang nagpasimuno nito kundi mga kabataang Pinoy. (Correct me if I’m wrong.) Wikipedia has its own origin and explanation about this phenomena. Totoo, may mga kahalintulad tayong salita sa ibang lenggwahe pero, iba ang gamit at konteksto nila sa mga ito, bakit ito ang gagamitin nating panukat sa ating mga kababayang Jejemon o Bekimon? Bakit mo gagamitin ang “root word” na Greek (jejerius/monnius) sa Filipino context? Siyempre iba ang meaning ng JEJEMON sa kanila kumpara sa atin.

Sa Bicol ang salitang “antak” ay sitaw sa Tagalog, sa Pampanga ay genitals din ito ng babae. (O yan, sex education na tayo!) Pero bakit ‘di natin sinasabi na sa dyablo ito? Dahil may iba-iba tayong gamit sa mga salita at letra depende sa grupo ng tao at sa lugar. O eto, alam mo ba ang kahulugan ng ababa-shi-kata-baba-andi? Di ko rin alam, pero yan ang ilan sa mga salitang naririnig ko pag may nag-i-speaking in tongues na walang translation. Kahit di ko maintindihan, I respect those who speak in tongues at kahit ‘di nila i-explain I won’t call them evil unless sabihin ng Diyos na evil sila. Baka, speaking in-tongues is their way of being intimate with the Lord or expressing their thoughts/emotions to God.

Sa mga close na magkaka-ibigan o magkakakilala, may meaning ang kung minsan ay ordinaryong salita na sila-sila lang ang nakaka-intindi dahil may sarili silang gamit dito. Halimbawa sa magboyfriend/girlfriend, nagtatawagan sila ng gummy bear ('di dahil makunat sila) o tawag ko sa isa kong kaibigan miswah ('di dahil masabaw s'ya.)

Ang salita ay salita lamang hanggat bibigyan mo ito ng kahulugan o meron kang i-a-associate na isang bagay dito. Ang bawat tao at lugar ay may kanya-kanyang kahulugan at gamit sa mga salita. Hindi dahil masama o negatibo ang isang salita sa iyo ganun na rin ito sa iba.

Pag-aralan muna natin ang mga bagay-bagay. ‘Wag basta padalos-dalos sa pagkakalat ng maling impormasyon. Sa halip na magka-unawaan at magka-isa tayo lalo lang tayong nagkakahati-hati at nag-aaway. Sa halip na maka-akay tayo, tayo pa ang nagtutulak sa iba palayo. Sa halip na maging instrumento tayo ng pag-ibig at kapayapaan, husga at panlalait ang nangagaling sa atin. Ano ba naman yan?

Hinay-hinay lang kaibigan. Kung masama, ipaliwanag natin bakit ito masama. Kung mali, baka naman spelling lang ang mali o ang utak lang natin ang 'di maka-gets.

Is Jejemon or Jejenese evil, I don’t think so but being judgemental is. (James 4:11)

What Did You Say?

(pic c/o this site)

What Did You Say?
Lj T. Salceda

Name it and I’ve probably been called by it- pangit (ugly), Agta (comparing me to the native people with darker complexion), Britney Spears with a frog in her throat (describing my singing voice), snake (when someone saw the patches and scales on my legs) and just recently immodest (because I was wearing an off-shoulder t-shirt). The rest will get a PG-13 or PG-18 rating from MTRCB so I wouldn't even include them here.

It’s not new to me. Being called names, criticized, bullied, being the butt of jokes have all been part of my childhood and even my adult life. I used to hide and cry to deal with them, but I’ve learned to laugh them off or sometimes I “join ‘em” since it’s futile to beat them.

It hurts me. Who wouldn’t be? I would be a hypocrite not to admit that. There are times when I still want to lash out or to get back to whoever is saying mean things about me no matter how true they are. I am after all every inch a human. It’s only been lately that I’ve learned to stand up and toughen up. Not violently though. When I say toughen up, I try to explain to people "you might mean well, but the way you said things was painful to me. I wish you’d do it in a nice way next time especially if we’re not close or since you don’t know much about me." Or if I’m close I make “bara” (colloquial: answer back jokingly.)

No excuses, I am as guilty as everyone else. A year ago, while a friend and I were fixing ourselves inside the ladies room in preparation for our hosting job, I told her there’s something different with the way one of the back-up singers look. My friend told me, that’s because she had something done on her face. And I without much thinking blurted out, “Oh that’s why she looks like a gay!” Uh oh... Too late. My intention was not to bash gays (I have the highest respect for them) or to even derogatorily compare her to gays. What I meant was the cosmetic procedure highlighted her masculine features and made her look altered and not in an aesthetically pleasing way. That wasn’t even the worst part. Before I could explain what I said, an old lady came out from one of the cubicles and gave me an “I’ve-heard-what-you-just-said-missy-look.” I didn’t need to put much blush on on my cheeks because I was red all over. So I learned the hard and embarrassing way that night.

As an announcer and a writer words are part of my day and my life. Sans them I couldn’t even think what life would be like. This page will be blank. Airwaves will just be airwaves without radios or TV’s. No magazines, no songs, no SMS, no prayers, no phone calls, no movies and no Pinoy Henyo. We could draw and paint pictures to communicate but that would take a long time. We could dance with just beats and no lyrics but that would be too taxing. We could mime, point with our lips, use facial expressions or even whistle to communicate but would you really do those everyday, your entire life?

Words – the ability to form and use them, the gift of expression, the extension of one’s self – these are all blessings. You don’t need to have my job to know how important and powerful words are. Let’s use them wisely and responsibly.

(I also wrote a short devotional article about handling criticisms in the Recharge book published by ICI and APMM. Available at NBS branches and Christian bookstores.)